Viral can be AMAZING

An amazing thing happened this week. A model, a Crohn's Disease sufferer with an ostomy bag…. posted a selfie, bag and all, for the world to see. It didn't take long for the photo to go viral.

Can I just say I LOVE LOVE LOVE this. I love that it went viral. I've only had mine since January - I'm a baby in the world of ostomy bags and joining the ranks of the colon-less. I am still learning to deal with it, be okay with it… be okay in my new skin.

Things like this help. Makes me less embarrassed by it, less ashamed of it.

A while back I posted a photo of my stoma (while it was still healing) and my ostomy bag because I knew people were curious. It was not an easy thing for me to do but… in the online world it's easier. You don't really have to deal with looks or questions in the same way than if you let it all out in real life.

I love what this has generated. I love the media attention to a disease that is really only starting to be more talked about, more known about. Sometimes I still have to stop and really let it hit me. I had TWO major surgeries this year and have NO COLON. Holy Moly… that's HUGE. I didn't get how serious all this was, not really, while I was going through it. All I could think about while I was going through everything was the pain, the hospital, how my family was dealing. I didn't really let myself REALLY think about what was happening to ME. It all seemed to happen fast. After YEARS of dealing with this disease, YEARS of pain… all of the sudden everything was about to be very different for me. I had to get that surgery I thought I'd never ever have to get.

My journey is still not over… I still have AT LEAST one surgery to go. Hell, my journey will NEVER be over aside from some sort of divine intervention that makes this disease leave me body. I will ALWAYS have Crohn's Disease. A common misconception I have gotten since these surgeries is that I am cured. Nope. Would be nice but nope.

All I can do is add my story to the others that seem to be popping up like wildfire online. I'll also add a new selfie - since my bikini covers it up, you'll have to settle for my mismatched underwear :)

Here I am - the new version of me. I have scars everywhere and they are ALL from this disease. Stretch marks from all the many ups and downs of prednisone. My stomach scars from two surgeries and a complication - like my second belly button as I refer to it? That one on the top is where I had to get stitches popped with the complication from surgery number two. Got to pack that wound (and one much lower) for weeks and weeks after I should have been healed. I did not enjoy that - it hurt and got infected more than once. But now… it's all just part of my story and I suppose with everything else, all the other selfies and awareness blogs about my disease I shouldn't be shy about it - I should just own it.